tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post6104619312056665125..comments2023-10-15T08:43:40.296-04:00Comments on zamphir panflutemaster: the unbirthday post (to be followed by the birthday post)crsehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05938033455038715980noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-76449412303497302602007-04-26T10:03:00.000-04:002007-04-26T10:03:00.000-04:00Thank you so much for this. I love it. It is so ...Thank you so much for this. I love it. It is so obviously from both the gut and the heart and it's just so right. I agree wholeheartedly. One of the first things I thought of when we were learning about the shooter was his mother. He was once her little boy, playing with cars, digging in dirt, trying to catch frogs and fireflies. Did she count the freckles on his nose while she watched him sleep after a hard day of playing outside? Did she sigh each time she emptied his pockets of crayons, pennies, bottle caps and candy wrappers when she did his laundry? Did she watch him walk the path to his first day of Kindergarten with her heart in her mouth? Did she cry when he left for college? Did she wonder what secrets he was keeping from her? Did she wonder what kind of woman he would marry, what kind of father he would be? And now, how does she deal with the loss of her son compounded with the knowledge of how she lost him and how the world now sees her baby boy? I think we just need to remember to have compassion for everyone involved and not get caught up in trying to find someone to blame for it. The only person to blame here is already dead. There is nowhere else to pass the buck.<BR/><BR/>NOW will you believe you are worthy of that Thinking Blogger Award?<BR/><BR/>Again, thank you.Pippajohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07651166001450622296noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-63803140618662115632007-04-23T22:02:00.000-04:002007-04-23T22:02:00.000-04:00Hey! You guys rock! Answering each other's observa...Hey! You guys rock! Answering each other's observations so i come back and dont have much work to do! A couple of things though<BR/><BR/>Ash-you rock. I keep thinking about our talk about "good enough" parenting. I have a lot of faith that you are going to give lei and the wombatess a huge toolbox to work with. Which leads me to <BR/>Zig- I love that metaphor. I think I told you before. I love it.<BR/>Jenny Ryan- Thank YOU for the affirmation. I was kind of scared to write this post.<BR/>Jay- I totally see what you are saying. But the problem is that you can force a kid to attend sessions? But you cant force him to learn from them. Because when i read that, I too thought, well...yeah you can force them. I worked in a university counseling center and we saw kids all the time that were "forced". Or offered counseling as an alternative to being thrown out. Im guessing thats what happened here. But the bottom line is, as MOTD says, unless they want to take the help, you are just burning daylight. I guess the difference between the managers and my field is, its going to suck just as bad no matter where they go off. <BR/>WSB- No they actually cannot share report cards. Even if you are paying for the child's education. ANY personal information is completely off limits, report cards included. Either way, from what I understood, the parents KNEW something was up. Or the mom did, she just didnt know what to do about it. I see what you are saying about the molestation comparison, but the truth is, this kid offered no direct threats. I should have mentioned before that Ive happily been wrong about the ticking time bombs before. Its pretty easy as a teacher, peer or parent to tell yourself that its probably not a big deal and its probably due to weirdness. As far as campus security goes, I can kind of understand that. A system that big is not easily shut down. Plus they thought the first incident was a murder/suicide so why complicate the investigation by creating hysteria on campus when the threat clearly appeared to be over. <BR/>MOTD- yeah....sigh.crsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05938033455038715980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-36133777233810276702007-04-23T21:00:00.000-04:002007-04-23T21:00:00.000-04:00I'll drink to that Mistress of the Dark!! :)I'll drink to that Mistress of the Dark!! :)ZigZagManhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03124688107164515604noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-31307629975163342222007-04-23T19:40:00.000-04:002007-04-23T19:40:00.000-04:00Everyone can play the blame game. The sad part is....Everyone can play the blame game. The sad part is..here was a kid that seemed to be crying out for love but wasn't getting it..and felt like he was the poor and downtrodden of the world...which is the truth...and he was stuck in a very posh school...and he was already a time bomb...from the beginning...this was something horrible waiting to happen. But you can't force anyone into counseling...it's like forcing a drinker or druggie into rehab..unless they truly want help...it's not going to work..<BR/><BR/>~sigh~The Mistress of the Darkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16923975714269274370noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-2224120609586260392007-04-23T18:57:00.000-04:002007-04-23T18:57:00.000-04:00My heart breaks for what Cho's family must be goin...My heart breaks for what Cho's family must be going through. I have often thought, what if my niece said "my daddy is molesting me?"<BR/><BR/>I mean, I know I would assume she is telling the truth, or at least look out for her best interests. Even if she wasn't, she either would need major help one way or another.<BR/><BR/>My point is, that I have often thought that I love those family members. What a shock that would be!! Would my mind really be able to accept that might be the truth?<BR/><BR/>I understand exactly about the parents not being able to accept that their child might be a danger. Or perhaps, they just didn't know.<BR/><BR/>I was shocked to hear that the university couldn't inform them that something was up. I understand that he's an adult, but they are able to share his report card, right? Why not something as serious as this?<BR/><BR/>Who knows if that would have just speeded up what happened though, instead of preventing it all together? One thing that I have learned about life is, there are some things that can not be controlled.<BR/><BR/>Now handling security at the University after the first attack, that is a whole different issue.....Winterskiprincesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17540416561657173099noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-65641333401447659832007-04-23T18:37:00.000-04:002007-04-23T18:37:00.000-04:00I've seen a few people from VaTech say that they c...I've seen a few people from VaTech say that they couldn't "force" Cho into counseling. My question is WHY NOT? Why couldn't they put counseling as a requirement for allowing him to stay in school? Especially after he was declared by court to be a threat.<BR/><BR/>I'm not blaming school admins or counselors or instructors. They are limited by what the law allows them to do when it comes to students. Not to mention each students right to privacy.<BR/><BR/>The same thing happens at companies all across the country. Just about every place has an employee that is a threat or a danger. And the managers just pray that when he goes off it won't be at work.Jayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17134850383532818765noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-68049633484054083772007-04-23T16:16:00.000-04:002007-04-23T16:16:00.000-04:00Thank you for this.Thank you for this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-22463600793826231262007-04-23T13:31:00.000-04:002007-04-23T13:31:00.000-04:00Buddy...as a parent...I worry every day, but my ho...Buddy...as a parent...I worry every day, but my hope...my best hope is I can do for them what was done for me.....give them a toolbox filled enough to get on in life, and the knowledge of how to aquire more tools as they need. It's an odd metaphore...but to us, it's our best hope..:)ZigZagManhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03124688107164515604noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30608643.post-48759804847575893322007-04-23T12:51:00.000-04:002007-04-23T12:51:00.000-04:00Life really does bite, babe. Sometimes you can't f...Life really does bite, babe. Sometimes you can't fix what's broken, most of the time you can't understand why it broke in the first place.<BR/>Keep your head up, what you are doing is important and amazing.Ashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18279863835026068855noreply@blogger.com