The (anti) dramatic conclusion

Ok Luckybuzz has pointed out the sad truth about this story. I will bullet the rest of the highlights.

• The narrator sounded like Boris Karloff in Grinch who stole Christmas.
• Madame Fabu pointed this out by singing “dah hu lor ay, fah hu dor ay” (or whatever it is) when he first started talking.
• He reminded me of a soulful, black Spike .
• These two things made me like the guy a lot.
• The story was interrupted by mad 80’s rock versions of traditional Christmas songs like “hark the herald angels sing” and “joy to the world”.
• Which was very nice until the guitar players tried to get us all to stand up.
• Which was ridiculous.
• Oh and there was a guy three rows up with a really big head who caused us all to have to occasionally shift to see the stage.
• I did not mind except when the narrator was talking.
• And was also the point where Madame Fabu pointed out her obsessive annoyance with a hunchbacked man two rows in front of us who was chewing his gum like his life depended on it.
• I found the gum chewing fascinating as it went “chew…chewchew” in a steady rhythm regardless of what was going on musically.
• The gist of the story seemed to involve a guy in a bar who was getting free drinks from a fellow telling a story about an angel traveling the world looking for hope or something.
• The angel found a guy who wanted his daughter to come home for Christmas
• The angel then found the guy’s daughter who wanted to go home too but couldn’t find a star to wish upon so she wished upon a bar sign.
• Somehow, she ended up in the bar and the bartender gave her money to get home
• At the end of the story the guy getting free drinks realized that he was probably talking to the angel.
• I was faced with the sad reality that in my town you don’t get free drinks from angels and you don’t get travel money from bartenders.
• All you get is fellows offering to get you high for a blow job.
• After a huge light and rock guitar finally, the annoying david lee roth wannabe introduced the band and thought he was a lot funnier and more of a superstar than he actually was.
• I was annoyed by this and prepared to leave gratefully thinking it was a fantastic show despite the basketball thing and the stage presence of the guitar jackasses.
• Then DLR announced that the show was only half over.
• They started the second half with “Proud Mary”. Which was extremely enjoyable.
• The rest of the show was a blur of crazy melding of Handel’s Messiah and other classical music pieces with over the top 80’s rock.
• Which was incredibly overstimulating
• And my butt was numb
• And when they asked if we were having fun, our group reply was basically “ask us forty five minutes ago”
• Speaking of which, TSO also contained several leggy blond women in plunging necklines, fish net stockings and spiked leather boots.
• These women came and sang right by us on the sound board stage.
• At some point, they covered the equipment with thermal blankets
• And raised this platform and shot flames from two little chalices of fire.
• The fire was very hot.
• To the point that Madame Fabu and I were shrinking away.
• The women were hot too
• But their hotness did not make me shrink away.
• Then they went back and the two guitar players came and played on the sound board platform too.
• And sent fog which froze the hell out of us.
• We saw DLR’s face in close up. He was an old and sad looking man.
• They wanted us to stand. We did not
• Finally it was over and we got the hell out of there because they were coming out to sign autographs.
• Oh I forgot the “Keyboard dual”.
• Keyboard dual?
• Are you fucking kidding me?
• Am I just too bitter and cynical to think that was not the cheesiest thing ever?
• The keyboardists did kick ass though.
• The show was Three. Hours. Long.

In summary (too late I know), the music was awesome. The light show was great. Everyone but DLR was extremely hot. And DLR was NOT an original member which made me think I would like the show if he was not part of it. Senor bought a CD and we listened on the way home. It was really nice actually….

804 words friends! Anyway, I promise this is the end of TSO. Lonnie Manko did have a very pleasant experience up in her seat so do not be deterred if you are thinking of seeing them. Unless you are Maggie May. Because my little soul drinking buddy, I think you will have a similar response as me....