I realize its tuesday and i will do my things to be happy about tuesday twelve when Gret does. Or before. Or after. Anyway here is my week in review (but not in any particular order)
* Wednesday was a grumpy day for both the perfect storm and me. We were both tired from the day out on tuesday and I was getting more and more bitter every time she bragged about making the pretzel. Hey PS! You sucked ok? Just accept it.
* Wednesday afternoon proved my theory about the correlation between my cleavage exposure and cooperation from the one guidance counselor. I didnt particularly need anything so I went crew neck. What I did not expect was for him to be a total prick throughout the whole meeting. It looks like Im going to have to get the girls back over there soon so he doesnt fuck up the rest of the year.
*Kickball was cancelled Wednesday night. I wasnt sorry because I was REALLY tired.
* Thursday was ok. There were a few dark moments like sitting in the Gulag house while the amazon mom was on the phone. She had a pair of toe nail clippers right there and friends, Ive never in my life felt so compelled to clip my toenails in my life. It was the strangest thing! All I could think of was taking off my shoes and clipping my toenails. It got better after she got off the phone but it really never subsided until I left. I never want to go to that place in my mind again friends.
* Thursday evening's supervision almost ended in a fist fight. instigated by me. because after arguing with someone for the better part of an hour throughout group, i had the realization she was not going to listen. which would have been fine if i wasnt fairly certain she was going to ignore my directive to keep her mouth shut to families and go about spreading misinformation. If this seemed confusing, let me sum up with this phrase JENNY MCARTHY IS NOT AN EXPERT ON AUTISM. It doesnt MATTER that she was on Larry King. SHE IS NOT AN EXPERT.
* Fortunately thursday ended well with two surprises. The first was a phone call from Norm saying I got my package. Guess what? My Rockdog stein came in the mail! Ill have pictures as soon as i can find my camera. Thanks RD. I feel commemorated.
* The second surprise was a lovely party hosted by my very good friend sega. It was one of those food parties. (And sorry lucy, i booked. Its sega's SISTER! She is really nice. Not like phyllis at all. And I promise vodka slushies). I realize this shouldnt have been a surprise but I kept forgetting about it so everytime madame fabu reminded me it was like finding out I had something fun to do all over again.
* I forgot. The third surprise was some home-made wine at the party from my other friend, Shakes. Apparently her father makes wine. I was particularly fond of the green apple!
* Friday morning wasnt great. I fucked up end of the month stuff and it took way longer than it should have so I missed my fifth grade party. The good part was i got there right when the sheep died in "Babe" (they watched a movie) so it went pretty fast.
* It got significantly better after I was done at school. I arrived at the office to find that Shakes had left me a bottle of green apple wine! Delightful friends. Just delightful.
* I then got to spend the evening first having dinner with Gretty (who gave us a gerbil) then drinks (and drinks) and bread with my darlin' Feather. It was much needed soul time all around and it also just tickles my spirit that Feather pronounces gerbil with a hard G which makes me think of Goebells. I dont know why that pleases me. It does though.
* Saturday. Ill sum up our saturday morning.(norm is angry and bitter. I am firm but whiny.)
Norm: I hate soccer.
Me: I hate soccer too but we still have to go.
Norm: Why? Its not fair.
Me: Because we made a commitment and im afraid of uncle-coaches wrath.
Norm: Whats a commitment
Me: Remember when i said you couldnt quit if you hated soccer when we signed up? That was a commitment
Norm: Why did you let me do that? Its all your fault.
Me: You said you wanted to play. It doesnt matter now because we are stuck until the end of the season and then we never have to do this again.
Norm: I hate soccer.
Me: Me too.
I think I will stop there. Saturday and Sunday were relatively uneventful. I took the kids to my brother's for the weekend, leaving gill to his own devices. He appeared to be intact and the house was somewhat better than when we left, so im guessing it went good for him too. Yesterday? The PTO meeting? Well...thats best left for the next post.....
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9 comments:
Jenny McArthy is HOT and people will listen to her...and take her word as the gospel truth. I took it more as her explaining her individual experience (saw her and her boobs on Oprah)
PS...Glad you enjoyed the Stein! You EARNED it! You ROCK!!!
Jenny McCarthy is not an expert on autism? Damn. And I so thought she had all the answers. She was on Oprah after all.
It's fuuny, when I read JM's 1st book, Belly Laughs (very funny btw) and she related her son's birth story, I said to my husband "Gee, her son's cord was wrapped around his neck just like Boy. Wouldn't it be weird if he ended up autistic too?" Now I feel bad.
Jenny McArthy is NOT an expert on Autism?? I'm shocked! She an expert on something though, I'm sure. Actually I like Jenny McArthy. She's funny.
Home made wine is good stuff. I've only done it once, but it turned out pretty good. And, home brewed beer is freaking awesome!!! I highly recommend you try some sometime.
Who the fuck is Jenny McCarthy?
And I am loving the idea that you have a tiny Goebells in a cage in your home.
I saw the Rockdog stein! It is very cool!
And I like Jenny McCarthy too.
Yay I'm so glad you aren't a real soccer mom!
Oh and get the ta tas out!
I'm troubled by the notion of wine made from non-grape stock. Apple you say? This is foreign and intriguing to me. Are you sure you weren't drinking pancake syrup?
I must investigate further before judging.
As for the girls - play fair and use them only for good.
Jenny McCarthy - I know I've heard the name. Spice girl?
Rockdog- you have a discriminating mind. I did hear she and the boobs hit oprah) You rock too?
Bunny- I know. When the big O sanctions you, you become gospel. I hate it when stuff like that happens with the saying and the happening!
Jay- Yes she is funny. I do not doubt her funniness or her intentions. Its not her fault. All she was doing was being hot and talking about her son. But thats not what people hear when she speaks. Gill home brewed beer back in the nineties. It was a glorious time.
LB- I dont actually know. She is this woman. I think she had a boob job in the nineties and promoted it. She is pretty. Her son has autism. Do you remember guido the hamster? Goebells fits right in!
Gretty- Youd be so proud of Norm and that gerbil. He is so patient.
MOTD- Me too buddy. Me too. And the ta-tas are back to work.
SB- If i was drinking pancake syrup then it was definitely wine-ish tasting and gave me a delightful sense of well-being! As for the girls, we have an ethical standard for using them. I have to admit, your response to the last boob post where you admitted you would probably feel up bob newhart has been extremely helpful in reducing the temptation to use them for power. I have a whole new perspective on them now. Thank you Sir.
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