Monday, March 12, 2007

bitch and moan monday

Ok im not completely crabby today, but ill do my best to keep up with the whining standards you've become accustomed to:

- I got lost today. I hate getting lost. The worst thing about getting lost in my caseload territory is that you can take a wrong turn, try to head back in the right direction, think you are going the right way for about thirty miles and end up in someone's driveway. I know what you are thinking. "Why would you be an idiot and refuse to turn around as soon as you realize you made the wrong turn?" Well friends, I think the answer lies within the question on that one.

-Another bad thing about being lost in my territory calling my local folks for directions. Not only does the connection break at the most inopportune times, (no signal in the middle of west bumblefuck? who would have thunk it?) but they have this weird provincial style of relating every landmark to what USED to be there, like they will tell you to turn where the old Hill's dept store used to be. Or where Buddy Frootloops uncle owned that bar. Or the second stop sign past Larry's dad's huntin grounds. No i didnt forget the g. They never add the g. Ok people could you be more inbred? (I say this with love to my dearest Madame Fabu who actually taught me where the Hill's used to be so I can operate more functionally around town).

- It can be very demoralizing when the mother of a child you've been working with for over four years whispers fearfully that she does not know what to do about her son's refusal to turn down the television. It took everything in me not to scream out "Are you fucking kidding me?" Newsflash lady: The state has paid thousands of dollars for you to grow a set and stand up to the kid now DO IT!

- The new pope scares the hell out of me. And this is not the only reason. Ive never been a huge fan of those in the papal position (although i am extremely intrigued by the pope of a hundred days or whatever from the seventies. Or was it eighties? and i liked the godfather connection too...for what its worth) (and I wouldnt mind spending some time poking through vatican city).

Ok bitch and moan monday officially ended six minutes ago. Norm is still awake (MUST UPDATE NORMISMS TODAY) and we both need to be sleeping.

11 comments:

luckybuzz said...

Oh. My. God. I know exactly what you mean about the directions-from-obsolete-landmarks, but I haven't thought about that in forever. Too freaking funny. :)

And I totally know where the Hill's used to be.

luckybuzz said...

But probably not the same Hill's.

luckybuzz said...

Also? When I was a little kid we got all of our school clothes at Hill's. Remember the dark blue jeans with the bright pink stitching? Yeah. I was that kid.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

I think this pope hates everyone. Being catholic...I'm pretending that I belong to another religion now. Of course if it said he hates Bob Dylan's singing, I would have to agree with him...

crse said...

Oh lb! I had toughskins baby! It was not a kind time in my life. Im wondering which hills it was?

MOTD: I never thought id love the old pope so much. Re Bob Dylan: Whoa there baby, we don't SAY stuff like that on this blog! (kidding, feel free to express away)

winterskibunny said...

I get lost ALL the time. That is until I got a portable GPS. My husband took mine for his job (you will realize the irony of that statement shortly), and I got Verizon wireless phone subscription for GPS on that. Not as good, but certaintly better than nothing.

winterskibunny said...

oh, and by the way, I belong to the tough skins club myself. All colors and floods when I was in junior high.

Also not a kind time in my life.

RockDog said...

Wow, I didn't know that Buddy Frotloops' uncle even owned a bar! I'll hvae to swing in there one night...can you email me directions???

Canada said...

I rarely get lost - somehow have a good sense of direction. But man, when I do, it will be remembered for YEARS. Like when I got Hubby lost in the woods when we were dating and started to get dark (came out at a farm with these odd people and the woman - thankfully not the man! - drove us back to our car). Or when I was annoyed with a group of 18 wheelers and passed them, and missed my exit completely. And there is NOWHERE to turn around after that until the next town. I found an alternate way back from there, but still haven't lived that one down (more than 10 yrs ago).

Lookin' forward to the Normisms update.

nancycle said...

I have adapted to the notion that getting lost is part of the job...as I understand it. Why crse, I make it a habit to call the branch and share just how f*&king lost I am. Perhaps it's part and parcel of having a large territory. Bottom line, you're not alone.

Kirby Carson said...

Just popped in to say HELLO :D