Monday, January 15, 2007

The petri dish that is my home

Did I say One? Horrible? Day? Yeah. That would have been my optimistic saturday.

Let me take this opportunity to thank all you good blog friends and well wishers. Im not going to bore you with details. Oh hell. Yes I am. But Ill graciously slash and summarize them!

-People are still sick here. All my RT friends who missed Luckybuzz in town (because it all happened so fast Im sorry!) take solace in the fact that you may have dodged this microbial nightmare. It continues still....

-An overabundance of television watching in the past 72 hours. The small OCD segment of my brain wants to make subheadings for the tv slashes but Im too damn tired and defeated.

-Spongebob continues to get funnier with every passing day. I get joy out of the old episodes but relish the new like long sought after treasures. My favorite SB quote today is Patrick referring to the culprit who made the oyster cry: "I have a few choice words for him. Like you....and are...and a jerk" Brilliant.

-Watched more of our firefly dvds this weekend. Realized that i find redeemable and likable traits about every character except Simon Tamm (River's brother. The dr.) Favorite quote describing this would be Jayne leafing through Simon's journal while pilfering his possessions: "Dear diary, today I was pompous and my sister was crazy." I heart Jayne.

- But who I dont heart is Tana. Now friends, I do not watch the apprentice. I dont watch reality tv in general. So until the level of my annoyance forced me to actually google her, I had no idea she had a past hooked to the overly played bedazzler commercial that has incited me to want to impale her head on a stick after bedazzling a chintzy american flag across her brow. She needs a whole post folks. A whole post.

- Along this line, Ive developed a Tana imitation for Gill's benefit. Except he does not find it beneficial. He may grab and squeeze and poke my broken hand until I stop, but I think he secretly finds it entertaining. Well I do, and isnt that what really matters in the relationship?

-Gill is also in denial about how utterly entertaining my new ring tone is. (We got new work phones, also another post) I really wish I knew how to post sound because IT. IS. AWESOME. If you have a motorola flip, you will know it as the "modern" tone. What do I like about this ring tone? It has a barry white song feel to it. So every time the phone rings, (which it doesnt unless Im calling myself because so far people are refusing to call my new number)(and yes I am calling myself because...) I can break into a little Barry White monologue for him. I really want this for my personal phone so when the bill collectors call and he gets ready to make a nervously charged critical comment, I can be like "hello baby....you lookin mighty fine tonight.....why so tense baby?... you just sit right down and let me rub you all over..." and we are ready for barry to break into song. He thinks this will be annoying. I say, he will experience it. He will love it.

-The Turnip seems to have crossed some sort of personality thresh-hold. Luckybuzz? what do you know about this? I keep telling myself that Norm was this "ornery" and that Turnip is just finding out about the world when he pokes my eye and laughs maniacally at my screams of pain. Thats normal 18 month behavior right?

-Which leads me to my eye goiter, who is named Pepe now courtesy of my friend T. Pepe has sort of metamorphasized into a different form. He does not hurt much on the inside but he is raw and painful on the outside. He also looks like a little mini-eye. (Why am I not yet getting mail to "frankie eyeball"?)

-Gill will not engage Pepe directly no matter how much I try to encourage this. And Norm has asked me please to not let Pepe speak to him anymore. As mentioned above, Turnip LOVES Pepe.

ok well this post is a good example of why i need to get back into the land of the living tomorrow. Sick children or no. Ive put enough leftover antibiotics into me that I should be able to make it at least till february!

Again thanks for the well-wishes and Ill keep working to bring quality entertainment while catching up with all of you folks!

2 comments:

luckybuzz said...

Dear god I love you. Even *more* when you're all slashy and semi-coherent? It's hard to say. :)

Jayne just rocks. He's so my favorite. I never really got Simon either....he's by far the least interesting character.
[confession: I own a Jayne action figure. Shhh. Don't tell anyone. Maybe I own two.]

And, crse, I'm fairly sure I wasn't in town long enough to ruin the Turnip. Unless he just picked up some of my antisocial tendencies during our one brief mindmeld? He did cackle a little when I put my forehead on his...that may have been when it happened.

Missing you. A lot.

Canada said...

Oh. My. God. I am laughing so hard I'm afrain that I'm going to wake up the kids!!

Not to laugh at the misfortunes of others, particularly those I consider friends, but really . . . The Barry White ringtone!!! Calling yourself!!! You crack me up (I do have a friend who likes to call himself when the phone is on vibrate and in his pocket . . .)

So, frankie eyeball, feel better, and be happy that it is, indeed, typical eighteen month old behaviour. And be fucking thankful you don't have twins!