avoidance of work reports

I have absolutely nothing to offer the blogosphere today. My tooth hurts. I think Im going to need a root canal. Gill is irritating the hell out of Norm by trying to make him play a tantagram game. How many ways can Norm say "I dont want to play this daddy" before Gill gets the point? No thats not rhetorical. Ive counted seven so far.

Today is the Turnip's first birthday. He is one year and forty five minutes old right now. And almost five times bigger than he was at birth. We just sang happy birthday. He was alarmed but he didnt cry. He was more like "what the hell are you guys doing?" To add to the strangeness, I kind of screwed up the birthday cake. Sometimes I don't know what possesses me to make bad choices, but instead of getting a cute animal cake (because they didn't have monkeys and we are doing his party in monkeys. No his party is not tonight. No nobody would have known) I bought some bizarre single layered red cake with cream cheese frosting. It wasnt even identified on the label. I have no idea what possessed me to buy this cake. Because I could see the red peeking through? The cake wasnt ....bad. It was just weird. Not something you would seek out, but you would probably eat it if it was in front of you. Unless you were Norm, who only ate the blue flower icing.

So Im mildly discouraged and not wanting to write two reports that are due tomorrow. In the background, Gill is saying, "Im going to make a better tantagram set". Yeah thats exactly the problem. Not the fact that the kid has an entire regurgitated toy store in his home, its that the cut up pieces of cardboard can actually be more inviting if you just "make it better". Norm just wants to play "crabby patty restaurant" (not the crusty crab mind you. Apparently he is worried about copyright infringement) with spiderman and batman. No villains. No fighting. I guess this is part of turning to the ways of good. Ok thats all I got today and as if on cue, the phone rings and the bastards at children's place who screwed me over are calling from collection. I think Im going to go snuggle the turnip before I get to work. We need that today.